At Peace or Not?

My aunt passed several years ago. She was cremated. My cousins split her ashes. This freaked me out. I am a firm believer you do not separate ashes. Why? I personally feel their soul is not at rest if their whole body is not together. 

Donnie, in a modestly priced receptacle.

My mother called me the other day and asked if, when she dies, I wanted some of her ashes and I told her no. I told her how I felt about that and I told her I hope my sisters don’t want some of her ashes either. As far as I know, they don’t.

This is something genuinely disturbing to me, when ashes are scattered or divided. 

I am an avid true crime fanatic. I LOVE these types of shows and podcasts. I’m not talking CSI Miami or Law Order type shows, I am talking legit, in the moment stuff and real stories. So, when I hear of bodies being dismembered and they can’t locate all the parts, I feel that soul isn’t at peace. This brings sadness over me.

When Josh and I die, we both want to be cremated and our ashes mixed. When we got married, we became one, so when we die, we want to continue “as one”. The first one to die will cremate the deceased and keep the ashes. When the other dies, we request our ashes be put together and placed in a community mausoleum.

We had discussed being buried on the property we will one day own and leave it in the family, but we figure at some point, someone won’t give a shit and sell off the land. Eventually we won’t mean anything to anyone living. Makes me sad to think that, but that’s just how life works. So, we thought about this instead.

I also believe you shouldn’t disrupt a grave. So, if we had land and were buried on it, our urn could be tossed away like it’s nothing, if found. Not everyone feels as I do regarding this.  

I guess, to a lot of people, this is rather morbid to discuss. But, we all die at some point. Josh and I are in our 40’s. While we are still young, we don’t know what tomorrow brings. I’d rather us know each other’s wishes than not.

So, what are your thoughts on ashes being separated? I have thought about this a lot lately. 

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